The Pornification of America by Bernadette Barton

Author:Bernadette Barton
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: NYU Press

Origins of Dick Pics

While most of the people I interviewed puzzled over the phenomenon of dick pics, particularly why men send them to women uninvited when women routinely and vociferously dislike them, everyone had an aha moment (“that makes sense”) when considering them in the context of gay men. The dick pic first emerged in gay male culture in the mid-1990s with the internet, webcams, and digital cameras. Gay men began sharing dick pics with one another as soon as the technology allowed it, and continue to do so with each new iteration of connectivity. Exchanges of dick pics are routine on apps such as Grindr, Growlr, and Scruff. Steven, who is 49, white, and gay, shared that he has seen “thousands.” James, 52, white, and gay, said he has also seen thousands. James calculated, “Let’s see, if you see 3,000 a year, conservatively 2,000 a year for seven years, that’s 14,000 dick pics. In a single day, you might look at ten dick pics or more.” So where Gwen is on the upper end of women receiving dick pics at over 500, her number would be low in gay male culture.

Giving and receiving dick pics among gay men requires skill and negotiation. Steven explained, “Some guys want to see it upfront. Others will talk back and forth for days or weeks.” James perceives those who send dick pics too soon, or unasked, as either immature or suffering from poor self-esteem, describing them as “young and chubby guys, insecure about their looks and themselves.” Gay men swap them before hookups, and some also include them among their profile pictures. A group of gay men at dinner might casually share and show dick pics they’ve recently seen, though there are rules about which ones are appropriate for semipublic gatherings: only stranger dicks. It’s rude to share photos of members belonging to friends, acquaintances, and boyfriends.

Steven understood the dick pic as a natural extension of male sexuality, stating that “men are very visual.” The gay men I interviewed were the most forgiving of unsolicited dick pics, shrugging them off as illustrations of insecurity, immaturity, and a normal male interest in one’s penis. Gay men also do not report feeling as uncomfortable and threatened as women do when they get an uninvited dick pic. In gay male culture, dick (and butthole) pics are common, normal, and, for the most part, wanted. James said frankly, “Men like their dicks. They play with them. There’s a constant interaction with your penis: is it the right size? Are women going to like it?” In contrast, all the heterosexuals I interviewed, including women and men, read unsolicited dick pics as negative—menacing, narcissistic, and intimidating. I think that gay male and heterosexual perceptions of dick pics differ because of each group’s relationship to rape culture. Images of penises are not threatening to gay men. They foreshadow sexual pleasure, not sexual assault. Also, as Kimberly will shortly explore, women are not socialized to see men’s bodies as “objects” to desire.

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